Success

A Spiritual Approach for Scary Times

I’ve been turning to A Course in Miracles a lot more these days. I may not be able to control current events, but, as the Course constantly reminds me, I can train my mind to control how I react to them.

This teaching has come in quite handy during the pandemic. Miraculously, in the midst of all the madness, I’ve managed to find serenity.

Your ability to redirect your thinking,” the Course exclaims, “is the most powerful device that was ever given you for change.”

The ability to redirect your thinking is based on what the Course calls “the most important concept that exists in the universe:” The Law of Cause and Effect. The Course explains this law very differently from the world’s Newtonian version.

To the world, a cause is an external incident which produces an internal effect. The market crashes (cause) and you panic (effect). Your boss complains (cause) and you get upset (effect).

Thank You!

I intended to write on a completely different topic. But as my hands hit the keys, I heard a voice in my head If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you…that will be enough.”

I felt that Meister Eckhart was sending me a message (and maybe you too) which I imagined went like this: Appreciate the abundance you have….and those who’ve made it possible. That alone will change your life.”

So today, in the spirit of Thanksgiving and a 13th century mystic, I’m taking this opportunity to say Thank You…

…to all of you who are reading this blog, even if it’s the only time you ever do, I truly appreciate you reading it today.

…to everyone who’s ever written to tell me how my work has impacted your life, you have no idea how your words have impacted mine. In fact, I have printed out and saved every one of your notes and emails.

Using Failure to Achieve Greatness

Did you hear about the MBA program offering a course on how to fail? Students are graded on how they handle setbacks in class projects. Classmates are encouraged to boo presentation they don’t like. Guest speakers recount stories of personal failures.

Why aren’t there more courses like that? As inventor Charles Kettering noted, “Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world.”

Failure, an art??? Not in today’s world! With the emphasis on productivity, failure must be avoided at all costs.

How shortsighted. Trying to avoid messing up is a sure path to mediocrity. But those aiming for Greatness never shy away from possible defeat.

Henry Ford, Colonel Sanders, Walt Disney all went broke at least once before amassing millions. Lincoln lost 7 elections before becoming president. Einstein flunked math. Babe Ruth struck out 1330 times, more than any other major league player. Elvis Presley was fired from the Grand Ole Opry.

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To Earn More, Learn to Toughen Up (Without Hardening Your Heart)

By nature, we women tend to be pleasers. We want everyone to like us.

High earners are no different. Almost every six-and seven-figure woman I’ve interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

But financial success requires us to make difficult, even painful decisions that often have negative consequences for others—like firing folks you like, holding tight in tense negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, dismissing high paying but difficult clients, enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.

So many women I interviewed regretted not making those tough decisions sooner. As one told me: “I kept trying to be nice. Eventually I had to toughen up.”

Toughening up doesn’t mean you have to harden your heart, numb your senses, or act all macho.

Toughening up does require a dramatic shift in mindset, which sounds like this: I’d rather be respected than liked.

4 Foolproof Techniques for Calming Fear

I often ask under earners, “When’s the last time you did something you were scared to do?” They’d scratch their heads, seemingly stumped.

When I ask high earners, they laugh and say, “All the time. It’s a way of life.”

Ages ago, after one of those conversations, I pulled out a piece of paper and wrote, in red crayon: Do What You Fear. That’s How You SucceedIt still sits, framed, on my desk today.

Though Joseph Campbell put it far more eloquently: The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.”

Admittedly, entering the Cave of Fear is…well…terrifying…for everyone. I have yet to meet a successful woman who hasn’t struggled with fear and self-doubt.

Observations From a Financial Therapist: Money Problems Are Never About Money

Let me give you my perspective on why you’re having money problems. This comes from 25 years working as a Financial Therapist.

You know that financial difficulty you’re facing—big or small? It’s about far more than money. It is, in truth, the call of your Soul trying to get your attention.

This problem actually provides you with a powerful opportunity for personal transformation. But what begins as a whisper will, if ignored, grow increasingly louder.

When you finally decide to face your difficulty, you begin the process of becoming all you’re meant to be.

Confronting and solving a Financial Challenge is what opens the door between the life you now live and the life you could be creating. On the other side of that door lies your power.

When You Combine Profit with Purpose…Watch Out!!! (Part 1)

I’ve learned so much from interviewing high earners. Above all, I learned that a Profit Motive is a prerequisite for financial success.

But what propelled those women to higher levels was an added spiritual component, a deep commitment to a Higher Purpose.

While men tend to be motivated largely by profit, perks, and prestige, once we women are financially secure, we shift our focus to how we can serve.

“It happened when my mentality shifted to making a difference,” a successful financial advisor told me of how she went from six figures to seven. “You get to a point where you have more than you need, so you start thinking how you can help others.”

Thriving, Not Just Surviving…Post Pandemic

The pandemic is hopefully subsiding. Many of you (including myself) may be wondering, as things change, how can I thrive, not just survive, financially?

After all, we are entering a ‘new normal.’ Unexpected doors may be opening. New opportunities may appear.

To make sure you thrive, you must heed these 5 words: Financial Success belongs to the focused.

Without focus, it’s easy to get sidetracked by multiple distractions fighting for your attention.

But with focus, conflicting objectives cease to control you, making it easier (and less stressful) to take decisive action without second guessing.

Admittedly, focusing can be frustrating for the multi-talented or very gifted. So what’s the trick to getting focused?

In a word: Prioritize. Focus exclusively on the tasks that will help you flourish financially. All else goes on the back burner.

Negotiation—A Novel Approach

I admit it. When it comes to negotiating—anything—I always lapse into a temporary panic. Words like adversarial, nerve-wracking and intimidating leap to mind.

However, when I met Rhonda Noordyk and was a guest on her podcast, Divorce Conversations for Women, my whole attitude changed. A former financial advisor, Rhonda left the industry in 2014 to become a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst. She created The Woman’s Financial Wellness Center, devoted to ensuring women achieve financial justice in a divorce.

I was instantly impressed with Rhonda’s sunny disposition and her razor-sharp intelligence, so I invited her to speak to my online community, The Wealth Connection.

She completely transformed my view of negotiation by introducing the acronym, ANOT.

“It’s a very powerful acronym,” Rhonda explained. “Our clients have had 100% success rate with it. In fact, it’s great for all kinds of communications, even emails.”

If You’re in Transition, Read This!!!

She had just separated from her husband, moved to a new town and was trying to restart the coaching business she’d put on hold.

Yet she kept procrastinating doing the things she needed to do.

“I feel stuck,” she sighed. “Like I hit a brick wall.”

“You’re not stuck,” I told her. “You’re in transition. And transitions are a bitch.”

I spoke from experience. I remember, back in the 80’s, when I moved to San Francisco, a dream come true. But as soon as I settled in, I sank into a confusing funk. This wasn’t what I expected.

That’s when I read Transitions: Making sense of Life’s Changes by Bill Bridges and understood what was happening. A transition is a gradual psychological process of reorienting to the new situation.

Primitive societies had rituals to give meaning to life’s transitions. Members were taken out of their villages, into the wilderness, where they didn’t know what was going to happen next.

“Every time we make a change,” Bridges writes, “We take a metaphorical journey into the wilderness.”

The wilderness is full of uncertainty, indecision, confusion, disorientation, vacillation–all a vital part of the reorientation process.

The ‘in-between’ period is not a time to commit. Or take decisive action. Or even make plans.

It is a time to feel our feelings, grieve our losses, practice self-care and, like the primitives, commune with our spirit guides.

We need to unhook from the past before we can create a new future.

“The more you can tolerate, even embrace, uncertainty,” I told my client, “the quicker you will get through it.”

Eventually, I assured her, your energy will return. Opportunities will appear. Loose ends will come together. Out of the chaos of uncertainty, new beginnings will inevitably emerge.

How have you successfully navigated transitions in your life? Leave me a comment below.

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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