Have you thought about the legacy you want to leave? Not just the business you want to build or the career you want to pursue. But how you want to be remembered after you’re gone?
Every one of us leaves a legacy—be it Greatness or Mediocrity. But surprisingly few reflect on what they want theirs to be. Yet it is an important point for us all to ponder.
Your legacy need not light up the sky. It need leave only the slightest footprint in the sand.
Whenever life gets hard, doors won’t open, nothing goes right—I know I need to ask myself a question. Where am I out of integrity?
The word integrity comes from a Latin root, meaning wholeness or entirety.
Whenever you’re not asking for what you want, spending money you don’t have, or your behavior is out of synch with your most cherished values and highest aspirations, you’re giving away your power, sabotaging your success.
Conversely, you take your power back by identifying, verbalizing and living your truth, moment by moment by moment.
Or, as A Course in Miracles puts it: “there is nothing you say that contradicts what you think or do.”
Can you guess what the biggest hazard to your financial success is? Those devilish how-tos. You know, thinking you have to have it all figured before you begin. Because that’s exactly what slows you down, or keeps you stuck
Those who have the most trouble thinking bigger are the ones who have to know exactly how they were going do it. If they can’t figure it out, they lower their sights.
I was in this category most of my life…until I interviewed six-figure women.
I learned a three-step plan from these women that made a huge difference.
Set a goal.
Commit to reach it (without knowing exactly how).
And grab hold of any unexpected opportunities that fall in your lap.
The second step is where the power is. Commitment, like a magnet, attracts coincidences. I always say, once you commit to a goal, if you’re not experiencing coincidences, you need to go back to the drawing board. You’re obviously not totally committed.
All my life, I’ve been a self-improvement junkie. Show me a seminar touting personal growth and it was like throwing raw meat to a ravenous lion. I’d hungrily pounce on it.
But when life went into lockdown in 2020, removing a myriad of distractions, I noticed something disturbing—how brutally critical I am of me. This wasn’t a new insight, of course, but I began to see how awful it felt.
So, I made a conscious decision. Rather than pushing myself to improve, I decided to practice Radical Self-Acceptance, loving myself, warts and all…especially the warts.
Don’t get me wrong. I still aspire to be better. But I’m finding a remarkable sense of freedom and well-being as I learn to fully embrace my shortcomings and my strengths, my achievements and my failures, without fear or false humility, without shame or recrimination.
Admittedly, radical self-acceptance can be quite challenging. Especially with those ubiquitous images on social media seducing us with the illusion of what’s possible when you strive for perfection.
I’ve long known that women’s difficulties with money have little to do with money per se and everything to do with their fear of power.
In a 2012 study, “Women and the Paradox of Power,” 38% of respondents said they’d rather be well-liked than powerful. As if the two were mutually exclusive.
Our confusion around power should come as no surprise. Historically, girls haven’t been groomed, expected, or encouraged to be successful, powerful adults.
If anything, we were raised as the power behind the throne, often punished for even aspiring higher.
I’m convinced, beneath our dislike of or discomfort with power, lurks a deeper, more ominous concern—the dire consequences we might suffer if we become truly powerful.
Historical narratives of strong, assertive, outspoken women being harshly punished, even burned at the stake, have permeated our collective unconscious.
Do you realize it’s been 20 years since The Secret was released. I’m still a big fan of the movie and occasionally watch the video.
Thanks to this wildly popular movie and subsequent book by Rhonda Bryne, the Law of Attraction is part of our vocabulary. And that’s a very good thing…to a point.
The Law of Attraction states that you attract whatever you want into your life through your ability to feel good, think positively, and focus only on the desired outcome. Simply put, if you want to be rich, don’t focus on lack.
But here’s the problem. How many times have you said you really want wealth, believe riches are on the way, refuse to focus on anything but abundance….and still, nothing happens? Your bills go unpaid while your bank balance dwindles.
What the Secret failed to mention is that the Law of Attraction is only part of the equation. There is also The Law of Congruency.
I often ask underearners, “When’s the last time you did something you were scared to do?” They’d scratch their heads, seemingly stumped.
When I ask high earners, they laugh and say, “All the time. It’s a way of life.”
Ages ago, after one of those conversations, I pulled out a piece of paper and wrote, in red crayon: Do What You Fear. That’s How You Succeed. It still sits, framed, on my desk today.
Though Joseph Campbell put it far more eloquently: “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.”
Admittedly, entering the Cave of Fear is…well…terrifying…for everyone. I have yet to meet a successful woman who hasn’t struggled with fear and self-doubt.
But—here’s the key—they didn’t let the fear stop them. Once I decided it wouldn’t stop me either, my income skyrocketed. But it wasn’t easy. It never is.
Let me suggest 4 techniques I use to significantly calm my fears.
For over 20 years, I’ve been baffled.
Sure, we women have become excellent dollar watchers and bargain hunters. But investors? Forget about it. We want to learn, but lack the confidence to act.
And here’s what’s really baffling. Once women enter in the market, we’re actually better investors than men. Key findings in a recent article on The Motley Fool, (https://www.fool.com/research/women-in-investing-research/) show that female investors earn better returns than men—up to 1.8% in some studies.
But only 9% of women think they make better investors than men according to a Fidelity report.
I’ll never forget reading an Allianz Study on women that came out after the financial crisis of 2008.
It made an exciting discovery. A new demographic was emerging—Women of Influence. These women aren’t necessarily high earners, or even gainfully employed, though many are.
What sets them apart is how financially savvy they are. In other words, as Allianz reports, this new breed is “more confident in their ability to spend, save, and invest wisely than the average woman.”
And what’s really exciting—These Women of Influence are becoming global change makers, claiming their power, owning their greatness, making an impact.
There’s no better time than today to start having a legendary love affair with your money.
Think of it this way…
Money is like the perfect romantic partner. All it wants to do is serve you, support you and protect you.
All money requires in return is for you to respect and appreciate it by taking good care of it.
In other words, money needs your attention. It needs your understanding. And it needs to feel valued.
