By nature, we women tend to be pleasers. We want everyone to like us.
High earners are no different. Almost every six-and seven-figure woman I’ve interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”
But financial success requires us to make difficult, even painful decisions that often have negative consequences for others—like firing folks you like, holding tight in tense negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, dismissing high paying but difficult clients, enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.
So many women I interviewed regretted not making those tough decisions sooner. As one told me: “I kept trying to be nice. Eventually I had to toughen up.”
Toughening up doesn’t mean you have to harden your heart, numb your senses, or act all macho.
Toughening up does require a dramatic shift in mindset, which sounds like this: I’d rather be respected than liked.