Success

Please…Stop Settling for Less When You Deserve More!

Let me ask you a question. When are you going to stop settling for less and start opting for more?

And, believe me, this isn’t just about money. When you decide to raise your sights financially, something profound will occur.

You’ll not only increase your income, but you’ll unearth your true essence. That’s what happened for me and I’ve repeatedly heard the same from others.

The successful woman I’ve interviewed often spoke more animatedly about their private awakening than their financial advancement, about breaking through the boundaries that had limited not only their livelihood, but their entire existence.

Numerous psychologists have told me that the amount people earn indicates how they feel about themselves, like a mirror reflecting back their level of self-worth.

The Secret to Financial Success…in Only Five Words

One day, I was glancing at the Wall Street Journal, when 5 words leapt off the page—”The survival of the focused.

I knew those five words carried a powerful message. A message High Earners understand very well. But one Underearners have failed to grasp.

Financial Success belongs to the focused.

Without focus, it’s easy to get sidetracked by multiple distractions fighting for your attention. But with focus, conflicting objectives cease to control you, making it easier (and less stressful) to take decisive action without second guessing.

A Sure-Fire Way to Increase Your Self Worth

I always asked High Earners: “Are you doing what you’re doing for the money?” No, they insisted, quite vehemently. They were driven by the  passion, by the challenge, by the recognition. But not money.

Yet, in the next breath, they all said the same thing. “But I damn well want to be well compensated…because I know I’m worth it!”

Where did their strong sense of self-worth come from, I initially wondered? As a chronic underearner, I wanted what they had. The answer soon became stunningly clear.

They had a simple strategy. Whenever they were asked to do something, whenever an opportunity arose, if their reaction wasn’t a strong ‘Hell Yes!’ it was clearly a “Hell No!”

These women each told me that, initially, they were afraid to speak up and tell the truth. But they forced themselves to ask for what they wanted, just as they said ‘no’ to what they didn’t want.

This simple (but scary) act was the secret to their financial success. Here’s why:

  • Asking for more is an act of self-love.
  • Saying no is a statement of self-respect.
  • Refusing to settle is a show of self-esteem.
  • And walking away is a sign of self-trust.

Whenever you stand up for what you want, whenever you refuse to take less than you deserve, your life will begin to change, sometimes dramatically.

You’ll also notice a shift in how you feel about yourself. Speaking up becomes not something you should do, but something you have to do – because you know in your heart you’re worth it.

Where do you need to start speaking up? Tell me about it in the comments below.

$uccess As a Spiritual Practice

Deepak Chopra once said, “We need a more spiritual approach to success and to affluence.”

I couldn’t agree more.

I even coined a word to describe this approach: Metafiscal–that which blends financial know-how with metaphysical principles; a melding of the sacred and the mundane in regards to money.

You don’t have to be religious to be Metafiscal. I’m certainly not. But something happens when you develop a deep sense of trust in the inexplicable forces of the Universe.

Looking for Yaysayers? Here’s How You Find Them.

Are you having a hard time achieving the level of success you desire and deserve?  Here’s some sage advice:  No one will do it for you, but you don’t have to do it alone!

I learned this from the savvy women I interviewed for my book. Prince Charming Isn’t Coming. Not one of those women succeeded in isolation. I realized I couldn’t either.

Listening to their stories inspired me to take action, despite my crippling fear, and showed me what to do to get smart.

Support is particularly critical for us women. We are relationship oriented. Connection is extremely important to us.

We thrive on the synergy of mutual support and collaboration. We love to share our experience with another. We do our best when others are cheering us on and holding us accountable.

But a word of warning is in order.  Be selective when seeking support. There are basically two kinds of people: the Naysayers and the Yaysayers.

Fear of Success? Or Fear of Power?

She sat across the table, looking like the savvy businesswoman she was.

As we chatted over kale salads, she told me how her company, not yet two years old, was growing exponentially.

Then she lowered her voice and leaned in close. “There’s something I need to talk about. I’ve never shared this with anyone.”

“What is it?” I asked, also leaning forward. I could tell this was difficult for her.

“I’m afraid of success. I can already see little ways I’m holding myself back.”

When I asked what scared her, she replied, “I’m afraid people won’t like me. I’m afraid people will want more of me than I can give them. I’m scared it will all be too much.”

A Spiritual Approach for Scary Times

I’ve been turning to A Course in Miracles a lot more these days. I may not be able to control current events, but, as the Course constantly reminds me, I can train my mind to control how I react to them.

This teaching has come in quite handy during the pandemic. Miraculously, in the midst of all the madness, I’ve managed to find serenity.

Your ability to redirect your thinking,” the Course exclaims, “is the most powerful device that was ever given you for change.”

The ability to redirect your thinking is based on what the Course calls “the most important concept that exists in the universe:” The Law of Cause and Effect. The Course explains this law very differently from the world’s Newtonian version.

To the world, a cause is an external incident which produces an internal effect. The market crashes (cause) and you panic (effect). Your boss complains (cause) and you get upset (effect).

Thank You!

I intended to write on a completely different topic. But as my hands hit the keys, I heard a voice in my head If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you…that will be enough.”

I felt that Meister Eckhart was sending me a message (and maybe you too) which I imagined went like this: Appreciate the abundance you have….and those who’ve made it possible. That alone will change your life.”

So today, in the spirit of Thanksgiving and a 13th century mystic, I’m taking this opportunity to say Thank You…

…to all of you who are reading this blog, even if it’s the only time you ever do, I truly appreciate you reading it today.

…to everyone who’s ever written to tell me how my work has impacted your life, you have no idea how your words have impacted mine. In fact, I have printed out and saved every one of your notes and emails.

Using Failure to Achieve Greatness

Did you hear about the MBA program offering a course on how to fail? Students are graded on how they handle setbacks in class projects. Classmates are encouraged to boo presentation they don’t like. Guest speakers recount stories of personal failures.

Why aren’t there more courses like that? As inventor Charles Kettering noted, “Failing is one of the greatest arts in the world.”

Failure, an art??? Not in today’s world! With the emphasis on productivity, failure must be avoided at all costs.

How shortsighted. Trying to avoid messing up is a sure path to mediocrity. But those aiming for Greatness never shy away from possible defeat.

Henry Ford, Colonel Sanders, Walt Disney all went broke at least once before amassing millions. Lincoln lost 7 elections before becoming president. Einstein flunked math. Babe Ruth struck out 1330 times, more than any other major league player. Elvis Presley was fired from the Grand Ole Opry.

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To Earn More, Learn to Toughen Up (Without Hardening Your Heart)

By nature, we women tend to be pleasers. We want everyone to like us.

High earners are no different. Almost every six-and seven-figure woman I’ve interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

But financial success requires us to make difficult, even painful decisions that often have negative consequences for others—like firing folks you like, holding tight in tense negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, dismissing high paying but difficult clients, enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.

So many women I interviewed regretted not making those tough decisions sooner. As one told me: “I kept trying to be nice. Eventually I had to toughen up.”

Toughening up doesn’t mean you have to harden your heart, numb your senses, or act all macho.

Toughening up does require a dramatic shift in mindset, which sounds like this: I’d rather be respected than liked.

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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