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Struggling with Sacred Success? 4 Reasons Why.

First a quick review.

Earlier I wrote about the 3 Levels of Financial Success: Survival, Stability, and Affluence. (see Let me introduce you to Sacred Success )

The 3rd stage, Affluence, is where most women get stuck. Why? Because  once a woman is financially stable, she’s rarely motivated by money.

That means women must approach level 3 with a different mindset—money is no longer the goal; Sacred Success is.

What does that mean?  Sacred Success® has 4 Prerequisites, 4 shifts in mindset that must occur. If these 4 traits aren’t firmly intact, your efforts to achieve and maintain affluence will likely become an exercise in struggle:

1.    A healthy respect for your value (You’ve had the click—you know you deserve to earn more for no other reason than you’re worth it—without which,  Sacred Success  is impossible)

2.    A healthy respect for money (which means obeying the  4 Rules of Money: Spend Less; Save More; Invest Wisely; Give Generously—in that order!)

3.    A strong profit motive (you’ve given yourself permission to prosper without conflict or ambivalence)

4.    A willingness to be uncomfortable (you actually welcome discomfort by actively looking for ways to stretch)

Check-in with yourself to make sure these 4 traits are integrated into your thinking. And in the future, whenever you flip into scarcity, feel like you’re stuck or find yourself struggling, immediately revisit these 4 to find the weak link. Sacred Success is not about being perfect…it’s about being persistent.

What’s keeping you from Greatness?

“The only thing standing between Greatness and me is me.”

–Woody Allen

Leave it to Woody to state the obvious. But I bet you don’t realize the insidious way countless women (me included) have been keeping ourselves from Achieving Greatness? I call it ATBS–Addicted to Busyness Syndrome.

We women stuff every cranny of our lives with so much activity that we’ve lost touch with what’s really essential and what’s truly irrelevant.

But ask us to lighten our load, actually say no to a task, and we start to panic. As if our world would shatter if we slowed down.  The truth is, we’ve become so controlled by shoulds, oughts, musts, have-tos that we’ve lost sight of what’s honestly important.

As you may know, I’ve spent the last 6 month clearing the clutter from my life. And I’m the first to admit—busyness is a bitch to give up!  Do you know why?  Busyness is the drug of choice for most women.

Without endless activity, we’re left with empty space. And empty space gives rise to painful feelings.  (For me, I felt unproductive, like a failure and a fraud)  Rather than experience the pain, we fill up the spaces. But, as I’ve learned from the last few months, when you stop running from the truth, you start recognizing your power. When you face what you fear, you realize it no longer controls you. When you eliminate the unnecessary, you begin to notice what really matters.

So I ask you….What could you slowly start cutting out of your day?  I’m not telling you to go cold turkey. But I invite you to observe all the needless activities you cram into your life– from constant emailing to extraneous chores.

What if you didn’t load the wash until later in the afternoon? What if you responded to emails only once a day? What if you didn’t answer the phone and instead stared out the window.

Maybe you’ll find what I did. It’s only in stillness that you’ll begin to hear the secrets your soul yearns to share. It’s only in the quiet that you’ll discover the path to Sacred Success™.

What is Greatness?

This one had me stumped.  I liked the sound of those words: “The Primary Goal for Sacred Success is Achieving Greatness” (see my last blog entry).  But admittedly, I was also intimidated by them.  

I thought of women I considered models of Greatness: Mother Teresa, Eleanor Roosevelt,  Betty Friedan.  But I also thought of my daughters—one an organic farmer, another a nursery school teacher, and the oldest a stay-at-home mom. I may be a bit biased, but I honestly see my girls going for Greatness, each in their own way.

So I began asking myself–“what does Greatness mean?”  According to Merriam-Webster, Greatness describes someone who is “remarkable in magnitude, degree or effectiveness.”

Every one of us is capable of remarkable feats. We don’t need to be anything extraordinary.  We do, however,  need to play full out.

Here are what I see as the 15 traits of Greatness:

1.      Greatness refuses to be limited or controlled in any way by fear. (Fear is to greatness what ants are to a picnic… annoying, inevitable, and best ignored)

2.      Greatness follows ideas that come from seemingly nowhere.

3.      Greatness doesn’t act alone. It has partners, collaborators, a team.

4.      Greatness is humble, not to be confused with Grandiosity. Grandiosity comes from the ego and is, as A Course in Miracles tells us, “always a cover for despair.”  Greatness is sourced from the soul and is always a desire to do what it came to earth to do.

5.      Greatness sees the world as it’s playground and every problem as part of The Game…a lawsuit is no more serious that losing a stapler.

6.      Greatness takes its mission (not itself) very seriously, and always puts that mission first.

7.      Greatness truly enjoys Greatness, not just for itself, but for its positive effect on others.

8.      Greatness  respects and appreciates money… sufficient income is necessary to eliminate any distractions for achieving its goals.

9.      Greatness isn’t perfect, and is more than willing not to be. Greatness feeds on self trust (the definition to self-trust: knowing you can clean up what you mess up!).

10. When pain enters Greatness, it’s meant to be a wake-up call.

11. Greatness is kind, but tough, and politely endures criticism.  While Greatness doesn’t need be liked, it demands to be respected.

12. The Arc of Greatness involves many mistakes, failures, wrong turns…they are the steppingstones to  Greatness.

13. Greatness is passion made manifest.  The biggest pitfall to Greatness–doing what you should vs. what you love.

14. Greatness requires responsibility, rejects mediocrity, and resides in the unknown.

15. When Greatness dies, it doesn’t go away. Greatness always leaves a legacy behind.

Anything you’d like to add???

The Paradox of Sacred Success™

Sacred Success is what my soul had been yearning for.  It just took me a while to figure that out. Perhaps you feel the same. Perhaps, like me and many others, even though you  deeply desire, definitely deserve and will likely reap hefty financial rewards,  you’ve somehow always known there’s more to success than making lots of money.

Sacred Success does not require sacrificing financial reward in order to find fulfillment and meaning.  Quite the contrary. Sacred Success merges higher incomes with a higher calling. Each successful woman I interviewed explicitly expressed her unshakable desire to increase her earnings. Yet her drive was no longer fueled by making more, more, more. . .

Here’s where I got stuck…until I discovered the  Paradox of Sacred Success

The Paradox goes like this: In order to play the game of Sacred Success, you must have a strong profit motive firmly in place….which is essential to overcome underearning and attain financial stability. But…here’s the catch…at this point, you must give up profit as your primary goal.  The Primary Goal for Sacred Success is Achieving Greatness.

Next:  exploring Greatness.

Let me introduce you to Sacred Success

I spent much of last year pondering this question: Why was I—along with scores of other women who’ve overcome underearning—still having difficulty cracking the code to even higher earnings?

Then, one day, it hit me.

Basically, there are three levels of financial development:

  1. Survival—doing whatever it takes to stay afloat
  2. Stability—generating enough cash flow to meet one’s needs, eliminate debt, and establish future security.
  3. Affluence—accumulating ample disposable income to live the life of one’s dreams.

The women I’d interviewed, who made millions,  were playing a very different game than what I had expected.  That’s because men tend to be highly motivated by profit, perks, and prestige. In the male world, the promise of affluence is a powerful incentive.

But not for women.  Once a woman becomes financially stable, she is no longer motivated by money.   What motivates her is helping others…or as numerous women described it, “ a search for significance.”

These are two very different paths to affluence. “Show me the money” versus “Show me how to help.” Too many women—like me—futilely struggle to navigate the first path, without realizing they have another option.

The latter is what I’ve come to call Scared Success™. It is the journey from stability to affluence…the game that is quietly being played by countless women (and, I might add, quite a few enlightened men!).

Stick around, and I’ll tell you exactly how to play!

Bye, Bye Surrender; Hello, Sacred Success™

I suspect my time spent in Surrender is drawing to a close.  I’m walking away with a whole new appreciation for down time and empty space.

But just recently, I’ve been sensing a shift.  My energy seems to be changing.

You know that light at the end of the tunnel I spoke about in Step # 6?  I think I’m there…standing in the light, not looking at it from afar.  The future is finally coming into focus.

I realize now, what I called Surrender was really Gestation. Despite feeling like  ‘nothing’ was happening,  I’ve actually been  quite ‘busy’ birthing a new body of work…which eventually will grow into my next book.

I call this new work Sacred Successthe next step after overcoming underearning. I stumbled upon Sacred Success while interviewing women who made millions.  But I really didn’t put all the pieces together until I surrendered.  Then, it was as if the pieces arranged themselves.

Just last week, like a proud mama, I took my new ‘baby’ out into the world.

I spoke at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts (www.mamagenas.com)… my first speech in ages.  I told them all about Sacred Success.  The 200 women in the audience were transfixed.  It was like my soul was speaking directly to theirs.  And they were hungry for what I was saying.  Afterwards, I was deluged by those clamoring to hear more.

Now I’m chomping at the bit to share Sacred Success with even more women.  I desire to do it right here on this blog.  So invite your friends.

Discovering Sacred Success has changed my life.  It really has.  I believe it can change yours too.  I’d love you to read my upcoming blogs and let me know what you think.  I genuinely want your feedback.

The Beginners Guide to Surrender–in 6 Simple Steps

Surrender is NOT for sissies.  Surrender, by definition, means relinquishing control…a frightening concept for us control freaks.  Surrender drops you swiftly into a sea of uncertainty, at the mercy of your worst fears, producing serious doubts about ever being productive again. I’m speaking from experience here.

But, despite the discomfort, I’m fast becoming a fan.  Something happened when I stopped struggling to impose my will and surrendered to receiving guidance–financial success started to feel like a spiritual journey.

Primitive cultures and Eastern Religions had rites and rituals to honor the Time- Between. They took their people out of the villages, into the wilderness, allowing them to connect with their spirit guides, reassess old ways of being, recognize their true purpose.

But no one teaches us, or even encourages, this practice any more.

So, for those of you wishing to take some time out in a rich and rewarding way, I bring you The Beginners Guide to Surrender ( so named because it’s written by a total beginner…me!).  There’s no need to leave your village, or even your job. Just follow these 6 simple (though not easy) steps.

Step #1—Eliminate everything but the most essential.

 

I remember saying to my guy last winter, “I wish I could take the next month off!”

“Why don’t you?” he responded.

I gasped. Taking time off was unthinkable.  Or was it?  I decided to ease into it slowly, by saying ‘no’ to things that didn’t feed my soul, no matter how lucrative…or tempting.  I said ‘no’ to speaking invitations, ‘no’ to networking opportunities, ‘no’ to new clients, ‘no’ to writing my newsletter and blog.  If anyone asked, I was on sabbatical until further notice.  I continued a little teaching and coaching, but only because I wanted to.

As a result I was left with a lot of down-time…which, of course, is the whole point.

But to many, down-time is a dirty word. And I know why:  we’ll do anything to avoid the dreaded step two.

Coming up: Step #2—Allow uncomfortable feelings to surface.

 

The Beginners Guide to Surrender – Step 2

After you’ve eliminated everything but the most essential you’re ready for Step 2…

Step #2—Allow uncomfortable feelings to surface.

Uncertainty, fear , self doubt–all those demons we’ve been artfully dodging through over-work, over-eating, over-spending and other drugs of choice—will inevitably rear their ugly heads.

For me, my biggest fear was being invisible, disappearing, not mattering.  I knew that was exactly what I had to face.  Because, I knew very well, on the other side of  fear is power. And, more than anything, I wanted to retrieve all the power I had given away in a myriad of ways.  So, too,  I yearned to retrieve all that creativity I felt I lost.  To that end, I also knew that uncertainty, as anxiety producing as it was for me,  is  the natural beginning of all creative acts, a primal state of pure energy, a very fertile time.

It’s been an emotional roller coaster, but I buckled in for the ride. As I wrote in Overcoming Underearning: “When you learn to face that which makes you fearful, it need never control you again.” I genuinely believe that!

Check back tomorrow for Step 3 – Reassess, reevaluate….

The Beginners Guide to Surrender – Step 3

I’m here to tell you,  it’s going to be very tempting to jump into idle distractions–like going on a shopping spree or planning an ambitious project—anything to avoid those difficult feelings. What I did, when I found myself looking for excuses to escape (ok, I admit I fell off the wagon a few times), was to throw myself into Step #3.

 

Step #3—Reassess, reevaluate

The first question most people ask themselves, when facing uncertainty, is: what should I do? I’m here to tell you, that’s the LAST question to pose.  The first questions should always be: What do I need to  let go of? Where am I giving my power away? A big piece of surrender is letting go of what’s holding us back, reclaiming our power. How do you know what needs to go? Whatever you’re most afraid to release.

For me, I was willing to let go of writing, speaking, my business in general, my identity in particular….I was willing to make space for whatever was to come next.

I used the time to ask myself questions: What am I here to do? How do I want to live? Who do I desire to help? Where do I want to make a difference?

I journaled, meditated, read A Course in Miracles, joined a master mind group, processed my insights daily with friends.

Self reflection became my major focus.

Coming up – the result of my self reflection.

The Beginners Guide to Surrender – Step 4

Surrender means taking time to go within.  It also means looking outward with new eyes.  That’s what Step #4 is all about.

Step #4—Receive consciously.

Receiving is an acquired skill most of us have never learned.  I’ve come to see that Successful Surrender requires Conscious Receiving. And the first Rule of Conscious Receiving is:  Give Up Judgment.  In other words:

  • Everything that happens, ‘good’ and ‘bad’, is seen as a message or a gift.
  • There is no negative, there is no positive, there is only information.
  • Whatever  occurs during Surrender is simply feedback about your future.

For example, during this period, I got an idea for a book, was all excited, and sent it my agent. He rejected it immediately.  Normally, I’d be devastated…and, admittedly, I was for a bit. But I began looking for the gift, the message, the lesson.  I figured it wasn’t time for the book but I’d be shown when it was.  And if not the book, something else will surface.

I continued to journal, meditate, self-reflect . Then, a few weeks ago, someone asked me when I was going to do another newsletter. Of course, I took it as a sign. As I wrote it, I felt compelled to blog. So, here I am.  Who knows what’s next!

Next: Final Steps

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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