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Women are Not Men! (Part I)

Written by Barbara Huson

Excuse me while I climb up on my favorite soapbox.

I can’t help myself. Dailyworth posed a question that got me all worked up.

What would you tell the financial industry about how, specifically, they can better serve women?

Oh boy. So much to tell. So little space.

But I’d start with this: Women are not men!

Obvious, right? But clearly, the financial industry hasn’t gotten that memo.

I’m a big fan of financial professionals. I’ve had the same advisor for 11 years (after going through nine others that didn’t get the memo either). I even wrote a booklet, “Finding a Financial Advisor You Can Trust.”

Sadly, the bulk of advisors (I’m including both sexes here) still live in the dark ages when it comes to female clients.

So, inspired by DailyWorth, here are my suggestion for how the financial industry can shape up and better serve women. I call it:

What Women Wish You Knew Before They Walk into Your Office, Part I

1. Women are all about relationships. Men are transaction oriented. Men communicate to obtain info, establish status, and show independence. Women are ‘other’ oriented. Women communicate to create relationships and make connections. So when dealing with women, think in terms of ‘connecting with’ rather than ‘selling to.’

2. Inspire rather than frighten. The industry seems to think the best way to motivate women is with scary statistics and worst case scenarios. But fear produces paralysis in most women. If you want to motivate a woman, speak to what inspires her, NOT what scares her. While men define success as being in control, women define success is how well they can help others (it’s that relationship thing!). So, instead of filling her with fear, show her how informed investing allows her to help people she loves and causes she’s passionate about.

More pointers coming in Part II. Meanwhile, feel free to send this list to any advisor you know. You’ll be doing them a big favor.

Women are Not Men! (Part II)

Written by Barbara Huson

Not long ago, I responded to the DailyWorth question: What would you tell the financial industry about how, specifically, they can better serve women?

And, Lord knows, they sure do need help serving women. Smart Money reports that over 70% of women feel under served and dissatisfied with the financial-planning services they receive.

So listen up, all you financial pros. I offered 2 pointers in the first part of this blog. Here are 4 more.

What Women Wish You Knew Before They Walk into Your Office, Part II

1. Educate her. While men prefer to learn through trial and error, women want to be taught.  A study by Deloitte & Touche found that 90% of women expected their advisor to provide education and guidance rather than “sell them on effective investment practices.” And never assume just because a woman wears a designer suit or has an executive title,  she’s savvy with her own money.

2. Think seminars. Women enjoy  seminars because they get to gather in groups, talk among themselves, network, exchange views, learn they’re not alone.   But make sure the seminar you’re offering is really designed for women  and not just a generic clone. Women have distinct issues around  money, different from men, due to their upbringing, cultural conditioning, and  emotional blocks.  Address, don’t avoid, those issues. (Shameless plug:  I offer two turn-key seminars designed specifically for women to be given by financial advisors.)

3. Show respect. Treat women as intelligent adults.  I’m aghast at how many advisors still tend to patronize women, address only the  husband,  or speak ‘financialese’. Being treated with dignity is a big deal for women. We  do not want to be sold to or pressured in any way. We want to feel listened to, understood,  given  choices and time to make our decisions. When we say “I’ll think about it” it doesn’t mean ‘no’…it usually means we’re going to kick around the ideas with  others, which is what we do!

4. Address her emotions. This is a tough one for  advisors, to whom talk of emotions is too touchy feely.  But like it or not, money is a highly  emotional topic for most women.  It’s been our forbidden fruit. You don’t have to be a shrink (though many advisors now partner with therapists or coaches). Ask her  questions,  allow her to talk about her fear, listen to her feelings, slowly educate her, and focus on inspiring rather than scaring her.

This is, by no means, a definitive list. What you would add? Tell me in the comments below. And I’ll pass them on to the wonderful folks at Daily Worth.

While you’re at it, you might want to subscribe. It’s free!

Metafiscal Goes Mainstream (OMG!)

Written by Barbara Huson

Well, I’ll be darn. Is the Wall Street Journal turning Metafiscal?

I open last Saturday’s Journal and there it was… a half page article waxing Metafiscal.  Of course, it didn’t use that term.  But it certainly preached a major principle. (Read the WSJ article)

According to the article, the biggest super stars swore their stellar success was literally sanctioned by God.

The reporter was focusing on pop singers, pro athletes, and movie stars (who, admittedly, could also be accused of narcissism). Nevertheless, the mega earners I interviewed–who were very successful,  just not in the spotlight–told me the very same thing…

…in almost identical words.  Talent is important but never underestimate the “motivating power of divine conviction” to stack the odds in your favor.

“Believing that God wants you to be famous,” says the reporter Neil Strauss, “actually improves your chance of being famous.”

On the flip side Strauss discovered,  “many equally talented but slightly less famous musicians I  interviewed felt their success was accidental or undeserved—and soon after fell out of the limelight.”

This  “faith gap,” he says,  “is often what sets the merely famous apart from the ridiculously famous. It can make the difference between achieving what’s possible and accomplishing what seems impossible.”

This is precisely how Sacred Success works.  And it makes perfect sense.  Those with a Divine sense of mission–who believe their marching orders come from a Higher Authority–possess a fire in their belly that makes them unstoppable.

Makes you think, doesn’t it?  What is your Divine  Purpose?  Do you believe you even have one?  I’d love you to share  your thoughts in the comments below.

If you want to learn more about Sacred Success click here.

A “Metafiscal” Moment!

Written by Barbara Huson

So, I’m on a walk with my good friend, Suzy.  We’re talking about metaphysical stuff. Only she mispronounces the word. She calls it: Metafiscal.

Suzy laughs. I shriek! It was a pure light bulb moment.

“Ohmygawd,” I exclaim. “That’s my word. Metafiscal!”

To me,  financial success, especially for women, is both a practical process AND  a spiritual journey.

Now I have a word to describe it. Metafiscal

Metafiscal (adj)—that which blends financial know-how with metaphysical principles; a melding of the sacred and the mundane in regards to money.

The word perfectly captures the essence of all my teachings, but especially my most recent, Sacred Success™, which I’ve often described as the Wall Street Journal meets A Course in Miracles. Now I’ll just simply say it’s my latest Metafiscal work.

Guess what folks. I am a Metafiscal teacher!  Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?

5 Words Say it All…

Written by Barbara Huson

I’m flipping through the Wall Street Journal, when 5 words practically slap me in the face. I’ve no idea what the article was about. But the phrase super-glued itself to my brain.

“The Survival of the Focused…”

Those 5 words sum up the Big Secret to mega financial success.

Those 5 words mark the major distinction between an Underearner and a High Earner.

Those 5 words capture the very essence of what it takes to achieve Greatness.

And for anyone who’s struggling to make ends meet, or live their dream, I say heed those 5 words.

I’m convinced these 5 words offer the key to not just surviving, but thriving, in this new economic paradigm.

This may sound weird, but I’ve always considered myself blessed with an unfair advantage. I’m only good at and enjoy doing 2 things: writing and teaching. Period! I understand why so many with far more skills than I often feel stymied.

Focusing can be very frustrating for the multi-faceted or multi-gifted. But if you want my advice–prioritize your passions. No matter how many interests, talents, opportunities, or possibilities are available to you, financial success will go to the focused.

Do you agree? I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please leave me a comment below!

Anyone Understand ‘Financialese’?

Written by Barbara Huson

Have you ever met with a financial advisor, and wished you had a translator?  My sister and I, spouses too, have spent the past few months interviewing various advisors for some family trusts.

Nice people, all of them. But once they got started talking, they were suddenly speaking a foreign tongue.

I thought I knew this tongue. I really did. I’ve written 5 books about money. I even wrote one on Finding a Financial Advisor You Can Trust.

But these folks, at various points in the discussion,  had my head reeling.

At first, I was a bit embarrassed. I mean, I should know this stuff, right?

Then it hit me. No wonder so many women aren’t getting the financial help they need. One conversation with an advisor and their heads are reeling too. And most of them just want to put their reeling heads right back in the sand.

Consider this blog (in part) a Plea to Professionals. C’mon, you guys. Speak in plain English. And then check in with clients at frequent intervals to make sure they’re tracking.

But, truth is, I don’t hold out much hope.

And the truth is the onus is on us. I am a Big Believer in working with professionals…be it for a root canal  or retirement planning.  And sometimes the latter can be as painful as the former! But it doesn’t need to be.

Not if we’re willing to speak up,  ask for clarification, and keep asking until we understand.

It all boils down to this. If  you don’t understand  ‘Financialese,’ it doesn’t mean you’re stupid.  It’s simply a sign to ask more questions.  The payoff is clarity. But, I’m here to tell you, the real reward is how powerful you’ll feel for standing up for yourself.

Can you relate to this post? You can tell me about your conversations with a financial advisor by leaving a comment below.

STOPPING The Oh-So-Subtle Self–Sabotage

Written by Barbara Huson

In my previous post, I played true confessions.  I fessed up that, years ago, I constantly put myself down…without really knowing it!

I have a hunch many of you do the same.  And believe me, self depreciation is a subtle but serious form of self sabotage.

I’d like to share what I did to stop. It wasn’t easy. I’m far from perfect. But success is so much easier since I curtailed my self-criticism and began acknowledging my value.

Here’s my 3-point plan to Stop Self Criticism—Observe; Brag; Find Spotters.

  1. I started by observing my conversations. Every time I heard me belittling myself, I stopped. Literally stopped, mid-sentence, and force myself to say something positive…even if it was just ‘thank you.’
  2. I started bragging (thanks to Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts). I mean, I actually prefaced sentences with “I brag…” and then tooted my own horn.
  3. I shared my goal with a few close friends, asking  them to spot me by pointing out my more subtle put-downs. They had no trouble catching me in the act.  Their feedback was quite effective.

Admittedly, these steps, at first, felt ridiculously uncomfortable, completely awkward. But gradually, I began to notice something.  My self-derision all but disappeared. And I felt much better about myself.

I’m here to say, I swear it’s true–what you share, you definitely strengthen. Please leave a comment below on how these steps support you in achieving greatness.

The Talk!

Written by Barbara Huson

I think it’s time we have The Talk. Don’t you? You know, the one about the Legacy you wish to leave. It’s a subject that deserves serious thought.

Leaving a Legacy is how you achieve Greatness. It goes right to the core of why you’re here and the mark you wish to make on the world you leave behind.

Some of you know exactly what it is. Mine, of course, is that there are a lot more financially empowered women running this country as a result of my work. And a lot fewer abused women who can’t afford to leave their abuser.

But many of you may be scratching your heads, wondering, ‘huh, what’s mine?’

Your legacy doesn’t need to light up the sky. It could be the tiniest footprint in the sand. All that matters: your legacy reflects your purpose fulfilled.

Need help? Try this exercise.

Imagine that it’s far in the future. You are lying on your deathbed. You’ve lead a long and meaningful life, but it’s now drawing to a close. As you lie there, you begin to review your past. What gave you the most satisfaction, outside of your family, to know this is what you’ll be remembered for? It need not be limited to one thing, either.

Once you pinpoint what it is, come back to this moment. Then ask yourself: What can I do right now that will contribute to the legacy I wish to leave?

Please share below by leaving a comment…I can’t wait to hear your insights.

Wanna Find True Power?

Written by Barbara Huson

I’ve been blogging about Sacred Success for almost a year. My purpose: to show you how to create Affluence—in a way that is meaningful to you and beneficial to others—by doing what you were put on this planet to do.

In review, Sacred Success unfolds in 4 Stages:

  1. Stage #1: responding to the Call to Greatness
  2. Stage #2: receiving consciously, surrendering to what is
  3. Stage #3: pursuing your highest purpose by exercising discipline.

We’re now at the 4th and final stage: leaving a legacy by modeling Greatness.

The truth is, we are always modeling something: either Greatness or Mediocrity (often disguised as Grandiosity).

Most people, as you can guess, are modeling Mediocrity. Why? Because it’s easy. All you have to do is stay in your comfort zone.   But to  model Greatness, you must  recognize your value, live your Purpose , leap into the unknown, let your light shine, and  leave your mark on the world.

This 4th stage is where Real Power lies. I believe when enough Enlightened Women, (along with enlightened Men) come together to model Greatness, our collective legacies will change the world, heal this planet. It all starts with each one of us.

Have you thought about the legacy you wish to leave?

Need help? I’ll share some tips in my next blog.

Until then leave a comment below about which stage in Sacred Success you are navigating right now.

My Last Ditty on Discipline (at least for now)

Written by Barbara Huson

I wonder if we women aren’t lacking a gene that makes this form of discipline especially difficult.  The final technique,  Strategic thinking, means keeping one eye on your higher purpose without taking the other off the bottom line.

Men seem much savvier at strategic thinking. Women, in their eagerness to give back to  their community or give birth to their dreams, often neglect this critical step.

To  think strategically, you must constantly link your Big Vision to the costs of doing business, connect your mission statement to the profit/loss statement.

One  woman explained it this way: “Connect everything with the numbers. To be a successful business woman, you have to strategize all the time on how to make the numbers work.”

And another,  a business owner  “The secret to a million dollars is continuously reevaluating the expenses to run a lean, mean business.”

And still another: “Once you know where the profit is, it’s just a matter of multiplying how many widgets you need to sell.”

Basically, strategic thinking involves:

  • figuring out the costs to do business
  • cutting losses when something wasn’t working
  • designing effective structures and systems
  • daily strategizing and yearly long term planning

Strategic thinking did not come easily to many of these women.

“This is not my nature,” said a former journalist, “I’m a writer. It was something I had to learn. No matter how passionate you are, you have to have business savvy.”

You can learn to think strategically by reading books, taking classes, talking to others, and/or consulting with professionals in or outside your industry.

I find strategic thinking is best done with others. My advice for tackling this technique– form a Strategic Task Force. Invite people (anywhere from 1 to 10) you trust, respect, and admire. Meet with them regularly to help you stay on track  strategically or  contact them when you need strategic solutions to problematic situations.

Please comment on your experience with strategic thinking.  This is definitely something I want to learn more about!

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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