Transitions Are Invitations

Written by Barbara Huson

Transitions can be a bitch! They tend to shake up our routines and perspective. Moving to a new city, starting a new project, or even deciding to change a daily habit can feel disorienting, unsettling.

I remember right after divorcing my gambling husband, I was determined to take charge of my money, to be a positive role model for my 3 young daughters. But the fear of failure would stop me before I even began.

However, as I’ve come to see, transitions are invitations. They’re designed to stretch us, to push us out of our comfort zone–where success always lies.

Growth usually comes disguised as discomfort. It’s easy to resist it, to wait until it feels “safe” or “the time is right.” But the right time is always now.

As the Chinese saying goes; “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years. The second best time is today.”

Who Said Money = Power?

Written by Barbara Huson

Money does not give you power. Power comes from the choices you make. That’s a very important distinction.

Not all high earners are powerful women.

Successful women fall into two groups. The Successful High Earners and the Hard-driven High Earners.

The hard-driven ones I describe as superwomen on steroids, classic workaholics. They’ll breakdown before they’ll slow down.

These are not powerful women. In fact, they have more in common with underearners than their higher paid peers. They live in deprivation…not necessarily of money, but time, joy, freedom, and control of their life.

One of the defining characteristics of Successful High Earners is that they actually take time for relaxation and self-reflection, to figure out what is really important. Their decisions are based, not on fear, but on their most cherished values.

Here’s Where You’ll Find Success…Guaranteed

Written by Barbara Huson

If success seems to elude you, here’s a guaranteed approach for finding it. Do what you don’t want to do, are afraid to do, think you can’t do.

Whenever you decide to do something different—whether it’s making more money or changing careers—success always lies just outside your comfort zone.

The only way you’ll succeed is by stretching beyond what feels comfortable to what may seem impossible.

The ability to tolerate discomfort by doing what might not feel good, but doing it anyway—is the only way you’ll ever find financial success.

For us pleasure-seeking, pain-avoiding creatures, that’s a very tall order. It’s certainly not comfortable to face up to a challenge, acknowledge a problem, and it’s especially unnerving to eschew our habitual ways of handling them.

Yet, that’s exactly what’s required. The real work in raising the bar is to stop doing the same old thing you’ve always done, to try out new strategies, to ignore false alarms, to resist the urge to quit, and refuse to fall back into familiar terrain.

You Can’t Do That! Who Do You Think You Are?

Written by Barbara Huson

We all have internal critics. The ones that tell us what we can’t possibly do, how we’re sure to screw up if we even try.

Those voices may never shut up. Mine sure haven’t.

But recently I had an epiphany. Just because I hear voices in my head, doesn’t mean I have to heed them.

If you hear a voice within you say, ‘You cannot paint.’ by all means paint and the voice will be silenced. ~~Vincent Van Gogh

Instead of listening to that voice, I just keep reminding myself: that’s not my voice. It’s the voice of my dad, the culture, teachers, something ‘out there.’ But it isn’t mine.

The Feminine Face of Power

Written by Barbara Huson

Let’s talk about Power, shall we? It’s a crucial conversation if you’re aspiring to affluence. You cannot possibly create and retain wealth without fully owning your power.

Despite what ‘they’ say, money does not give you power. Take my marriage to the gambler. I had the money, but he had the power. I gave it to him by letting him make all the financial decisions. I was too scared.

I’m convinced that women’s difficulties with money have very little to do with money per se and everything to do with our fear of or ambivalence about power.

The problem: We don’t understand power from a feminine perspective. For whatever reason, the sexes view power very differently.

Women exercise power by building relationships. Men by asserting control. Women work best in collaborative models of ‘power with.’ Men favor a hierarchical model of ‘power over.’

The Trinity of Trust

Written by Barbara Huson

Years ago, I trusted my husband with my money. He was a stockbroker after all. But, alas, he lost almost everything. After our divorce, I was terrified to trust anyone again.

Then at some point it dawned on me. I couldn’t just ignore money. I needed to start trusting myself. But how? I was financially clueless.

If you’re in a similar situation, let me introduce you to what I’ve come to call the Trinity of Trust. It’s how I began the journey of reclaiming my power and trusting myself to take financial responsibility.

THE TRINITY OF TRUST:

As I spent time connecting with each point on this triangle, I found myself building a firm foundation of trust in myself, in others who were trustworthy, and in my Higher Power.

Are You a Victim of Financial Abuse? 10 Red Flags

Written by Barbara Huson

Financial abuse is a serious form of domestic violence, but no one ever really talks about it.

While financial abuse is devastating, many, like me, may be totally unaware it’s happening to them.

In the beginning, financial abuse can be so subtle it’s easily misinterpreted as a loving gesture.

“I don’t want finances to stress you,” my first husband would say to me. “Let, me take care of the money and I’ll give what you need.”

However, as in my case, the abuser’s efforts to control will, in time, escalate into intimidation, threats of violence and often, physical harm.

How do you know if you’re a victim? Here are 10 Red Flags. Read them carefully and circle the ones that apply to you:

If You’re in Transition, Read This!!!

Written by Barbara Huson

She had just separated from her husband, moved to a new town and was trying to restart the coaching business she’d put on hold.

Yet she kept procrastinating doing the things she needed to do.

“I feel stuck,” she sighed. “Like I hit a brick wall.”

“You’re not stuck,” I told her. “You’re in transition. And transitions are a bitch.”

I spoke from experience. I remember, back in the 80’s, when I moved to San Francisco, a dream come true. But as soon as I settled in, I sank into a confusing funk. This wasn’t what I expected.

That’s when I read Transitions: Making sense of Life’s Changes by Bill Bridges and understood what was happening. A transition is a gradual psychological process of reorientation to the new situation.

Primitive societies had rituals to give meaning to life’s transitions. Members were taken out of their villages, into the wilderness, where they didn’t know what was going to happen next.

Has It Clicked Yet?

Written by Barbara Huson

I call it the Click. It’s that ‘aha’ moment when you recognize, with every fiber of your being, that you deserve to earn more for no other reason than you’re worth it

Without the Click, upping your income can be an uphill battle. But once you realize how capable you are, how much value you offer, barriers that once felt insurmountable will begin to disappear.

You see, there is a direct correlation between your level of self-esteem and the amount that you earn.

Virtually every high earner I interviewed for my books swore money was not her primary motivation. But at the same time, she fully expected to be highly compensated because she knew she was worth it.

How do you build that kind of self-esteem? How do you access the Click? Simply put: Do what you dread.

Money: Thy Name is Woman

Written by Barbara Huson

Do you know where the word “money” has its origins? It might surprise you.

The English word for money came from a Roman goddess, whose name was Juno Moneta. In ancient Rome, she was the guardian of finances. Her temple became the first treasury. It was in her temple that the earliest coins were minted.

Think about what this means. As women, money and power are our birthright. Don’t let anyone try to tell you otherwise!

Does this information surprise you? Why? Share your thoughts below.

Blog

Transitions Are Invitations

Who Said Money = Power?

Here’s Where You’ll Find Success…Guaranteed

You Can’t Do That! Who Do You Think You Are?

The Feminine Face of Power

The Trinity of Trust

Are You a Victim of Financial Abuse? 10 Red Flags

If You’re in Transition, Read This!!!

Has It Clicked Yet?

Money: Thy Name is Woman

Meet Barbara Huson

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