Women & Wealth

Professionally Successful – Financially Strapped! Oh My!

On the outside, she had it all together. A successful entrepreneur who made loads of money, dressed exquisitely, and lived in luxury.

But every morning she woke up feeling like “there’s ground glass in my gut.” Under her polished veneer, she was drowning in debt.

“I am making good money, but I have nothing to show for it,“ she told me. “I’m broke but nobody knows it.”

Our successful entrepreneur represents a raging epidemic—people who are professionally successful but financially strapped.

Most experts advocate budgeting as the best solution. But she had tried repeatedly to follow a budget, only to fail miserably.

The truth is, will power alone is never enough to stop compulsive behaviors. Because money isn’t the problem, but a symptom of something deeper.

How I Rewired My Brain for Higher Earnings…without even realizing I was doing it.

Here’s a revealing exercise. How would you complete the sentence: I’d love to make more money, but_______________.

You probably came up with some perfectly good reasons why you can’t: “I’m too old. I’m too young. I don’t have time. I have little kids. I don’t want to work that hard.”

Your reasons may feel rational. But they are not the truth. They are simply deep-seated beliefs, messages you repeatedly heard growing up that have become deeply embedded in your brain.

These beliefs, far more than any external factors, are the reason you’re stuck in underearning. Whenever you attempt to do something contrary to your beliefs, your brain screams bloody murder: “Stop! Don’t go there! Danger! Danger!”

When You Encounter an Obstacle, Don’t Forget to Say Thank You!

In my book Sacred Success, I issue a warning: When you commit to Greatness, everything unlike itself will come up to be healed. Life gets in the way. Obstacles arise. Shit happens. Breakdowns occur.

To the masses, obstacles are like ticking time bombs, something to quickly defuse or avoid altogether.

But for those pursuing Greatness, obstacles are doorways to healing and growth. What seems to get in the way is the way to transformation.

“Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again.” A Course in Miracles tells us, “So where you made a faulty choice before you can now make a better one and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought you.”

Difficulties are not diversions from Greatness but proof of dysfunctional patterns that are, thankfully, being brought into awareness so you can correct them. These patterns are precisely what’s been preventing you from achieving Greatness.

Practicing Radical Self-Acceptance

All my life, I’ve been a self-improvement junkie. Show me a seminar touting personal growth and it was like throwing raw meat to a ravenous lion. I’d hungrily pounce on it.

But then life went into lockdown, removing a myriad of distractions. That’s when I noticed something disturbing—how brutally critical I am of me. This wasn’t a new insight, of course, but I began to see how awful it felt.

So, I made a conscious decision. Rather than pushing myself to improve, I decided to practice Radical Self-Acceptance, loving myself, warts and all…especially the warts.

Don’t get me wrong. I still aspire to be better. But I’m finding a remarkable sense of freedom and well-being as I learn to fully embrace my shortcomings and my strengths, my achievements and my failures, without fear or false humility, without shame or recrimination.

Overcoming Financial Paralysis

I was newly divorced, raising 3 daughters, when I got tax bills for over $1m. My ex was responsible, but he left the country…leaving me with very little in the bank. My father refused to lend me the money. I was angry and terrified. I had no choice. I had to get smart about money.

I tried going to classes, reading books, but nothing made sense. I felt immobilized. Nowhere in those books or classes could I find a solution for my paralysis. Until I took matters in my own hands.

I stopped focusing on the practical mechanics of money and started plumbing the deepest recesses of my psyche. Writing in my journal proved profoundly revealing.

I became aware of a familiar voice that kept telling me how stupid I was. Instead of ignoring it or letting it hold sway, as I always did, I began a dialogue with that voice, asking it where it came from and what it wanted.

I immediately heard my father telling me, often and in no uncertain terms, that managing money was a man’s job. As a woman, I did not have what it took to deal with finances.

So of course, I was terrified that if I tried to take charge, I’d botch things badly, blow it all.

What Will Your Legacy Be?

I once saw a poster that made a lasting impact. On it was written: Will it matter that I was?

I recognized, in that instant, that I was on earth for a reason. I hadn’t a clue what it was, but I was hell-bent on finding it.

Every one of us leaves a legacy, but in my experience, surprisingly few reflect on what they want theirs to be. Yet, it’s an important point for us all to ponder.

I remember reading an article by a hospice physician about how many of her patients were “deeply disturbed” because they hadn’t “contributed anything significant to life.”

She had a profound realization: “It is far better to contemplate the meaning of life when we actually have some time left to work on the question.”

If you haven’t already, now is the time to contemplate your legacy. How? Ask yourself ‘What do I want my obituary to say?’

Becoming a Woman of Influence

At last. We have cause to celebrate. A major shift has been occurring in women’s relationship with money since the 2008 financial crisis.

As a result of that crisis—according to an Allianz Study, Women, Wealth, and Power—a new demographic is emerging, Women of Influence. These women aren’t necessarily high earners, or even gainfully employed, though many are.

What sets them apart is that they’re financially knowledgeable, Allianz reports, “more confident in their ability to spend, save, invest wisely than the average woman,”

And these Women of Influence are becoming global change makers, claiming their power, owning their greatness.

The Secret to Investing Wisely–Understand the Investment Pyramid

Let me introduce you to the Investment Pyramid. Understanding this pyramid was a game changer for me.

Decades ago, a wealthy family friend urged me to invest in a Limited Partnership, calling it a “an exciting opportunity.”

I didn’t know that a Limited Partnership was illiquid and I couldn’t sell my shares, even as I watched the company go bust.

When I told my accountant this story, he drew a triangle, divided it into 4 levels, explaining this represented the whole world of investing. My mistake was starting at the top.

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Wealth Building Made Simple…Very, Very Simple!

You’d love to be wealthy, right? But then immediately reject the idea as ridiculous. Let me assure you, creating wealth’s a lot simpler than you think. And you don’t need a lot of money to start.

What you do need is enough discipline to obey The 3 Rules of Wealth:

1. Spend Less—never spend money you don’t have. If you can’t pay off your credit cards in full each month, stop using them.

2. Save More—pay yourself first. Ideally, 10% of your income goes straight into savings. But $10 a month is totally fine. The idea is to get in the habit of saving.

3. Invest Wisely—put at least a portion of your money into assets will grow faster than inflation and taxes take it away, like stocks, bonds and real estate.

All 3 are critical. But Investing Wisely is how wealth is created. It’s also the rule that stymies most people.

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To Earn More, Learn to Toughen Up (Without Hardening Your Heart)

By nature, we women tend to be pleasers. We want everyone to like us.

High earners are no different. Almost every six-and seven-figure woman I’ve interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

But financial success requires us to make difficult, even painful decisions that often have negative consequences for others—like firing folks you like, holding tight in tense negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, dismissing high paying but difficult clients, enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.

So many women I interviewed regretted not making those tough decisions sooner. As one told me: “I kept trying to be nice. Eventually I had to toughen up.”

Toughening up doesn’t mean you have to harden your heart, numb your senses, or act all macho.

Toughening up does require a dramatic shift in mindset, which sounds like this: I’d rather be respected than liked.

Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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