Beware of Always Wanting More

I’ve spent most of my life yearning for more…more money, more success, more sales, the list goes on.

I proudly considered my perpetual wanting a healthy sign of a robust ambition. Until I began studying neuroscience and realized how truly unhealthy this kind of thinking actually is.

Here’s why: We literally sculpt our brain by what we dwell on. The more we think a thought or feel an emotion, the stronger that neuropathway becomes in our brain.

By constantly hungering for more, I was inadvertently telling my brain “I don’t have enough.”

The more I repeated that thought, the stronger the “not enough” neuropathway grew, until I’d unconsciously do things that kept reinforcing my experience of ‘not enough.’

Slowly it dawned on me. How can I expect more, if I was repeatedly focused on what I had not yet attained? Clearly, I needed to shift my focus to rewire my brain.

I decided to experiment. Every time I felt myself coveting anything, I stopped, took note and shifted into appreciation for what I currently had.

More money? I took a peek at my bank account, and gave thanks for the amount presently there.

More success? I gratefully reviewed what I’d achieved up to now.

The moment the thought creeps in, ‘but it’s not where I want to be…” I stop and refocus on how far I’ve come. I invite you to join me.

What if you shifted to gratitude for what you already have, rather than longing for more? I’m not asking you to give up your desires.

But I am suggesting that you view your desires through the appreciative lens of how they’ve been at least partially fulfilled. 

Then watch what happens. If your experience is like mine, you’re in for a few miracles!

How do you feel about cultivating an attitude of gratitude? Leave me a comment below.

Comments & Feedback

  • Katana Abbott

    Thank you Barbara for your wonderful words of wisdom. What’s so funny is that I was just “sitting for guidance” on a project I am about to launch, and was interrupted. I went back to my desk, and read this post, and am now going to finish my contemplation with your new insight. Sometimes we just need a fresh perspective to make a huge shift and viola! Big hugs and love…

    • barbara huson

      That makes me so happy, Katana, to know I was in some way part of your contemplative process and possibly huge shift. Thanks for letting me know. Sending you big hugs and love too. xoxo

  • Susanne

    So agree with you Barbara! I feel like I destroyed a lot of what i had already achieved by not valuing it more and valuing the people more. It is so importatant to constantly count our blessings and be grateful for what we have got.

  • Andrea Belrose

    Success creates success. I started over at 40 in a different state after a devastating divorce. It took me years to build back my career and savings account. But I have. I still would like to be debt free but I’m not. I’m 57. I know that in less than four years I will be. My house and car are beautiful. My parents are healthy in the 80s. I love my job. God has provided in the midst of chaos and adversity. I am grateful for wonderful friends, colleagues, and a purpose filled life. It feels good.

    • barbara huson

      So beautiful, Andrea. You’ve accomplished so much…and in less than 4 years you’ll be debt free! That’s quite an accomplishment. And your life is full of gifts. Kudos to you. Thanks for sharing with me!!!

  • Joseph Dillard

    What a great post! Unfortunately, our culture is not focused on contentment. Also, we spend too much time comparing ourselves to others. Like you said, it’s important to be grateful for what we have. Someone else would love to be in our shoes. Gratitude is key to our sanity and success. Thank you for sharing! All the best.

    • barbara huson

      Thank you Joseph. I’m guilty of comparing myself to other, I have to admit. But everything you wrote is what I use to get myself back in balance. Gratitude truly is the key…to everything. Thank YOU for sharing!

  • Patti Fagan

    Barbara, you are so right on! I think we are all being divinely guided to a new level of awareness. I had a similar awakening earlier this week during my prayer time. I started writing a blog about it, but had not published it. Reading your article inspired me to get it posted this week. When I feel myself start to yearn for what I don’t have, I switch my focus to the many blessings in my life. I’m living in the gratitude-zone. It feels so much lighter in this space! As usual, your words bring inspiration and clarity to my life. Thank you! xoxo P.S. Congratulations on your interview with Jean Chatzky!!! Nice work!!!

    • barbara huson

      I always love hearing from you Patti. Honestly, I think you are one of the most appreciative people I know…you truly live in gratitude. And I so appreciate your wonderful support…sending you big hugs of gratitude!

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Meet Barbara Huson

When a devastating financial crisis rocked her world, Barbara Huson knew she had to get smart about money… and she did. Now, she wants to empower every women to take charge of their money and take charge of their lives! She’s doing just that with her best-selling books, life changing retreats and private financial coaching.

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