Years ago, I trusted my husband with my money.  He was a stockbroker after all. But, alas, he lost almost everything.  After our divorce, I was terrified to trust anyone again.

Then at some point it dawned on me. I couldn’t just ignore money. I needed to start trusting myself. But how? I was financially clueless.

If you’re in a similar situation, let me introduce you to what I’ve come to call the Trinity of Trust. It’s how I began the journey of reclaiming my power and trusting myself to take financial responsibility.

THE TRINITY OF TRUST:

As I spent time connecting with each point on this triangle, I found myself building a firm foundation of trust in myself, in others who were trustworthy, and in my Higher Power.

One day, I was glancing at the Wall Street Journal, when 5 words leapt off the page—”The survival of the focused.”

I knew those five words carried a powerful message. A message High Earners understand very well. But one Underearners have failed to grasp.

Financial Success belongs to the focused.

Without focus, it’s easy to get sidetracked by multiple distractions fighting for your attention. But with focus, conflicting objectives cease to control you, making it easier (and less stressful) to take decisive action without second guessing.

What’s the trick to getting focused? Prioritize. Put your attention exclusively on your priorities. All else goes on the back burner.

Here’s a foolproof strategy for getting unstuck. You must let go of where you are to get to where you want to go.

Clinging to the security of the familiar ledge prevents us from discovering what awaits us in the future.

The ledges in our lives offer the illusion of safety, but in truth their only value is to keep us hanging.

These ledges take many forms, both concrete and intangible. They can look like unfulfilling jobs, unpleasant relationships, inappropriate goals, untrue beliefs, unhealthy habits, bottled-up emotions.

Every successful woman I interviewed who finally let go told me:

People often ask me what were the biggest surprises I had when interviewing successful women. This is definitely one.

I never expected how many told me they were actually grateful for past tribulations.

In fact, most admitted, they might never have succeeded had they not been challenged. They considered their past problems an asset and, even more, they appreciated themselves for tackling them head on.

Nothing gets in the way of financial success more than repressed anger.

In my experience, women in general hold a tremendous amount of unexpressed anger, though few realize it.

I certainly did but had no idea.  Until a therapist pointed out that I was carrying a lot of repressed rage, which was holding me hostage, unable to move forward.

As I worked on discharging my wrath, I had a revelation. Anger is simply energy. Repressed anger immobilizes. Released anger galvanizes.

When you find healthy ways to let go of resentment, you begin to notice a direct link between anger and power. Suppressing one inhibits expressing the other.

If you suspect you, too, may have some buried anger, I invite you to write an angry letter. Write it to your parents or ex-husband or maybe yourself. Write it by hand, not on a computer.

When you’re finished, burn the letter. As you watch it burn, say to your anger: “Thank you. You served me once. I no longer need you. I release you. Now I am free.”